In my 50s, I’m probably about 60% gray, with hair that looks and feels nothing like it used to. It was once medium in thickness, grew dense all over, and was naturally wavy. Now, it still grows fairly full in the back but noticeably thinner and sparser at the crown, sort of like a permanent mullet. It can go from polished to disheveled surprisingly quickly, so the minimal-effort approach of my younger years no longer cuts it. My hair has changed, and it’s not going back to what it was, but that’s not the goal anyway.
Being at the helm of the Good Housekeeping Institute Beauty Lab means I have no shortage of products to test and play with. Below are the styling tricks I’ve picked up along the way and the products that have earned a place in my routine.
How my hair has changed at 50
As we age, hormones, genetics, scalp oil production, and hair structure can make hair fiber finer, sparser, and more fragile as it becomes drier. Hair texture can also change (from straight to wavy or curly) as the follicles can take different shapes. It’s part of our job here at the Lab to understand what happens to hair as we age, but experiencing it yourself is another.
Over the last decade, I’ve watched my hairline widen, and my scalp become more visible when I pull my hair up. My grays kept multiplying and became harder to manage. While I was still dying my hair, it was harder to color and also faded faster. A white hairline was something I had to tend to every few weeks even as my hair seemed to grow more slowly overall.
Almost instinctively, new haircuts and different products followed. For someone who did not rely on styling products much before, it was a steep learning curve, but it turns out you can teach an old dog new tricks after all.
The wash routine that works for me now
✔️ I wash every other day. My hair doesn’t get particularly oily, and I can go for days without washing, but it looks best freshly washed. I keep my routine simple: I need volume but also softness and these two often work against each other. I’m not too fussy about shampoo; most formulas I try clean well and leave hair untangled. Conditioner is another story.
✔️ I prioritize moisture. I need more conditioning than I used to, but I look for lightweight formulas that bring back softness and manageability but keep it full-looking; most of the desired thickness and lift come from leave-in products and styling anyway.
In our testing, older, gray-haired testers praised this duo from L’Oreal for softening and brightening hair without sacrificing volume. I loved it too, and now buy it regularly.
✔️ I keep conditioner away from my roots. I apply it only from mid-length to ends. I also now leave it on for at least five minutes before rinsing. Both of these practices were give or take before. Now they are a must.
✔️ I skip heavy masks. They tend to be too much for me now, weighing my hair down and making it look like I got caught in the rain. I miss the indulgence and luxurious feel, but my hair is doing just fine without them.
✔️ I rinse really well. I pay particular attention to rinsing around my ears and the nape of my neck. Thoroughly rinsed hair feels softer, lighter, and much easier for me to style. My skin is more sensitive these days, too, so I don’t want any residue lingering.
✔️ I don't use very warm water. It causes dryness and irritation on my scalp and leaves it irritated and itchy. Plus, my hair looks dryer and frizzier.
✔️ I blow-dry my hair. I’ve never liked the feel of wet hair anyway, but since wet strands are more fragile, I make sure my hair is dry before going to bed. A warm, damp scalp can also encourage the growth of bacteria and yeast associated with dandruff.
The styling tricks I’ve learned along the way
✔️ I use different products on different sections. Some areas need smoothing, others need texture, volume, or control. One product no longer does it all.
✔️ I add texture and volume. Styling creams and leave-ins give limp hair more separation, hold a shape, and create fullness, but most of all provide a good grip when styling with a round brush. I’m not very keen on big, exaggerated volume, so it becomes somewhat of a delicate dance to make it look natural. The Kenra one below fits the bill for me.
✔️ I dry my hair upside down on low heat for volume. When I flip it back, it looks a little crazy but fun. I gently brush from roots to ends with a paddle brush as I dry to prevent tangles and add fullness. Once it’s about 70% to 80% dry, I finish by blow-drying it in sections.
✔️ I use brushes with good grip. I look for brushes that catch the hair well but glide through without pulling, helping me create lift and volume as I style. I love that this one from Olivia Garden comes with an in-handle pick for easy hair removal.
✔️ I camouflage my roots. Hair-thickening powders give roots lift and disguise visible scalp. Shades that work with white or gray hair are hard to find, but I found this Boldify Root Touchup in white. It has a built-in puffer that makes touch-ups easy (a small mirror helps). I find it impressively long-lasting, and it does not feel grimy.
✔️ I smooth hair. The hair above and around my ears is curlier and frizzier, and is particularly difficult to tame. I treat them with silky serums. I gravitate toward formulas that work on wet or dry hair for easy touch-ups. Finding the right amount takes some trial and error, but silicone-based serums usually smooth and soften without leaving hair feeling oily or heavy. The Davines one below is pricey, but a bottle lasts me a couple of years, and I love the scent. I also twist my hair ends slightly after applying it to create a soft wave.
✔️ I keep my blow-dryer heat on the lower side. My hair dries quickly now, even on lower settings, and medium heat on Dyson Supersonic r is often enough to create a lasting wave. For most hair dryers, the highest heat is wasted on my now finer hair, but I love Supersonic r’s strong airflow, lightweight design, and especially, the cool shot, which sets my style quickly.
✔️ I’m choosy about flat irons. Sleek gray hair looks the most polished, hands down (and I love showing it off in this way), but too much heat can leave it rough and yellow-looking. So when I straighten, I want to do it quickly and well. The GHD flat iron below maintains a constant 365°F while adjusting power as it moves through hair. It glides smoothly and straightens most sections in one pass (two in the stubborn back). And the automatic shutoff after 10 minutes of inactivity is a lifesaver.
✔️ I skip chemical straightening treatments. As nice as it is not to constantly police wandering strands, treatments that require very high heat to seal the product turn gray hair yellow. I learned that lesson the hard way (you can still see traces lingering on my ends below).
✔️ Occasionally I bring shine back to my gray. I colored my hair for most of my life, experimenting with highlights, lowlights, balayage, and nearly every shade from dark brown and red to blonde. I loved every phase and even grew to appreciate the transformative smell of bleach and hair dye. These days, with a kid in college, I’ve embraced my gray (and genuinely love it), but it still needs maintenance. Every couple of months, I use demi hair toners, like Age Beautiful below, to restore shine and brighten my grays. I do it on my own, by mixing the toner with 5V Gentle Creme Developer and process on damp hair for 5 min, but if I’m getting a haircut, I’ll sometimes add a toners or gloss then, too.
✔️ I play with hair accessories. Smaller, lighter clips and claws can hold all of my hair now, so the oversized versions are a thing of the past for me. I’m also wearing headbands for the first time in my life. They look nice and distract from my hair thinning areas. They are a godsend for unscheduled meetings, running errands, or those days when I don’t have time to fuss with my ever-expanding forehead. I especially like styles that can be adjusted for a comfortable, headache-free fit.
✔️ I put my hair into a bun. I like French hairpins because they’re lightweight, keep hair off my face, and put less tension on the strands around my temples. When I get it right (I’m still working on that), the result can look surprisingly regal. I didn’t think one would work with my hair length, but a little texturizing spray adds enough grip to hold everything in place.
✔️ I’ve settled on a medium hair length. These days, I’m happiest somewhere in the middle (though I definitely need a trim to remove the bulk from the back). This length is useful as it can look polished when I wear it down, but still easy to pull into a loose (although perhaps not effortless) bun.
Bottom line
I hope my little experiments help you along your own 50+ hair journey. There’s no right or wrong way to navigate it, as long as you’re mindful of damage and watch for extreme hair loss or big patches, in which case a trip to a doctor is in order. Some days my hair drives me crazy, and I’m tempted to cut it all off, but in general it makes me happy. I’ve been learning to work with what I have now and enjoy it along the way.
