Kristin Scott Thomas is a great actress and a great beauty and barely off either stage or screen. I would rush to see any play or film in which she appears, because she has a subtle, mesmerising presence and rarely puts in less than a bravura performance.
Now, at 53, she is claiming she felt invisible at the recent Cannes Film Festival in the presence of younger beauties. For an intelligent woman this struck me as a most silly remark. Of course she felt invisible. It is the nature of ageing, the nature of attraction and hardwired into mens brains for the purpose of reproduction that younger women are more visible. Youth and beauty are irresistible. Even I ogle young, beautiful women, theyre just such a pleasure to look at. But unlike most women, Kristin Scott Thomas has only just started to feel invisible, whereas many women I know say they have always felt that way. If youve been a man magnet all your life youre going to feel the loss more acutely than if your magnetic field has always been on the weak side.
We women so often contradict ourselves. I know women who have spent their teens, twenties and thirties getting furious at the catcalls coming from every building site they pass and who then go into mourning when the lewd comments dry up. Any serious analysis would, of course, have to take into account the extent to which the female of the species is prized, from earliest childhood, for being pretty and how looks can come to define our sense of self-worth.
I dont expect mens heads to turn when I pass in the street, but I can still get served in restaurants and shops and, as long as I use the crossing, rarely do I get mown down in the road. If I get noticed by my partner and my friends, Im happy. I have no desire for the man in the street to notice me, but I do want my beloved to. A clear signal to me that my marriage wasnt working out was when my now ex stopped commenting on my appearance, even when I was dressed to the nines for a party and knew I looked my best. On that level invisibility did hurt. It wasnt my appearance hed lost his love for, it was me as a woman, as a wife, and thats why he no longer saw me, even when I was at my most attractive.
There is one way I can still draw men on the street, and women and children, too. Hello, gorgeous, they say. Ooh, so cute and even may I stroke you. These are the kind of comments I receive from complete strangers when I step out with my shiny, black (albeit, like me ageing) Labrador. What Kristen Scott Thomas needs is her very own mutt.
Read Linda Kelsey's previous blogs here: The Age of Unreason.
Tell us what you think on Facebook and Twitter, or get in touch with Linda at [email protected]
